How to get out of depression by Jitu Das philosophy




Depression is the feeling that does not go away. For the last 2 or 3 years, I had a pain in my left eye and the pain won't go away. It would just stay and I ignored it for years because it was not a  hard pain, then it became hard, and I went to an eye specialist and he prescribed some pills and suggested an immediate eyeglass, I got them the next day and in a week, my eye pain was gone. Now I wear them all the time I am working on my tablet or laptop. The good thing is that I don't feel the pain, I am working a lot, writing a lot of my project works, assignments. So, if I have never gone to a doctor about my eye, I would not take eyeglass and my life would have become so much painful, but when I decided to do something about my pain, I found my relief, even though I did a big mistake, because I have suffered for years because of my ignorance of myself and my body. I was blaming my late night sleep for the eye pain, which was my mistake to think I knew the reason. So, in life, there is so many ailments, pain, disease, and failures and we make the mistakes of knowing the reason and sometimes not doing anything about the pain. We just tell ourselves that it's ok to feel the pain, sometimes you even tell yourself that you deserve the pain. But it's not about what you deserve in life, it's about what you want in life. Sometimes we convince ourselves that we deserve punishment or pain because we were not able to fulfill other's expectation. But punishing ourselves, feeling guilty, feeling hopeless is so easy that no matter how good day you are having, these thoughts of guilt, regret can make you feel like shit. So, when these thoughts come to your head, don't put the red carpet out and welcome them. From today they are not welcome anymore, but you would say that they will still come. Yes, they will come, but they can live outside the house, you can do that by paying no attention to them. There will be always thousands of reasons to be depressed,  you can either buy those reasons and be depressed or you can be happy and enjoy your life. You may say that how can you enjoy your life with all these feelings. Yes, you can enjoy your life, because you have all these feelings, it may sound contradictory, but to feel good, you must have also had some taste of bad feelings. To feel broadness, you have to feel narrowness, to feel the greatness you have to see the smallness. Anyway, the point is not to feel good, happy all the time, there will be some reasons you will be sad and there is nothing you can do, for example, if you lose someone if you lose something. That's okay to feel sad for some time, then you need to move on. But in the case of depression, you would feel that loss for thousands of other days. You would repeat the same feelings over and over again. What exactly happens in depression? In depression, you lose the spirit and you are always out of confidence. If you are feeling depressed, you may lose interest in food or eating, you may lose interest in people, you may lose interest in watching movie or tv or you may start watching movies or tv a lot. Depression is not completely mental, it's not only just thoughts. Sometimes depression could be s symptom of physical problems or disease. Sometimes depression could be a result of hormonal imbalance, it usually happens in middle-aged women. Sometimes depression could be because of chronic diseases. Chronic disease is a huge reason for depression. Chronic disease is those disease that can not be cured completely, they remain with you, sometimes they get worse and sometimes they are in control.


But if you have no disease and you still depressed? The first question you need to ask yourself is why you are feeling depressed. Is it because of past, present, and future? 


 The truth is that it is not the age of just science and technology, it is also an age of depression. In India, people used to have no depression, but I have observed that from my parent's generation which is from 1960. What is the cause of most parent’s depression?  The main cause, of course, is their children. Some parents are depressed about their children not studying, some are depressed because their children don’t behave well, sometimes the parents are depressed because their grown-up children do not have a job or a career. One of my worst feelings comes when I think about not having a job. Worrying or feeling depressed about not having a job is completely normal, but here I am trying to do something extra with my life, writing this post, hopefully to recover from my ailments, its like a confessing to someone, except I am talking about myself to thousands of people, but the thing is that I am ok with it, because what I am feeling is completely normal, even though I feel like shit because of this. But I can tell you with full confidence that everybody feels like shit sometimes. But what is the cause of it? What is the reason behind depression? The reasons are not the same for everyone, someone is depressed because he has no job, someone is depressed because he has no girlfriend and someone is depressed because they could not fulfill their parent’s wishes. The reason for depression could be anything he wants in life unless he gets it, that will cause a lot of depression. For example, if somebody wants to travel the world, he would be very depressed until he gets to travel the world if somebody wants a specific job, and until he gets what he desires. So, our desires are the roots of our depression too. But Depression is not just one thing. There are multiple reasons that can lead to depression.


Depression is nothing more than sadness, bad feelings that just don’t go away. There are also different types of Depression – Mild, Moderate, Severe, Very severe. To find out what is type of depression, you have to go to a Psychiatrist, he will ask you different questions. Then you will get your diagnosis whether you are depressed or not or if you, how severe it is.


But let's talk about what does it feel like when you are depressed. These are the common symptoms of Depression :





WHAT HAPPENS IN DEPRESSION  :




1.     You feel sad: The obvious symptom is that you feel sad and the sadness just doesn’t go away, it stays for days and months. If you are feeling sad for days, do notice the other symptoms.


2.     You look down yourself: If you are in depression, you start to hate, blame and look down n yourself. It becomes a habit of talking negative things to yourself, You say things like you are a piece of shit. But these are distorted thinking, they have no connection to the reality. This thinking can lead you to severe depression, which is not good. Depression is not something that only a few feel, it’s a universal disease caused by a failure in love, failure in work and mostly because you negative self-talking. You may think it’s okay to say bad things to yourself like you are coward, you are good for nothing, you will never find love, you will never be successful, you will never fulfill your dreams, but while you think its no big deal say these things to yourself, but at that moment your thoughts start to build negative feelings and it does not happen in one day. Never say these things to yourself, because the world is already cruel, don’t be cruel to yourself. The world is cruel in the sense that there is always too much judgment in the world, out of 100 people you meet, at least 30 might not like you, unless you are a star, even they have haters Anyway, the point is that don’t be hater of yourself, be a fan of yourself, try to compliment on the good things and inspire yourself.


3.     You feel guilt: In depression, you feel guilty, self-reproach. You feel like you have let people especially your parents. If you get sick or if there is any physical problem, you accept them as punishment.


4.     You feel suicidal: You feel like your life is not worth living. You wish you were dead.


5.     Insomnia: You can not fall asleep easily, you wake up in early hours.


6.     You feel like not working: One of the worst things is that you lose interest in your work. You feel like you are not capable of doing your work. You lose interest in your hobbies.


7.     You get isolated: You get isolated from people, you disconnect yourself from other people, friends, family. You lock your doors and stay in your room all by yourself.


8.     You feel anxiety: You feel anxiety, a restlessness in the body and the mind. An anxious mind creates an anxious heart. If you worry too much, you might develop hypertension and your heart may become abnormal, then you might develop a chest pain. This happened to me in my 1st year of B.Sc, while I was worried about my marks a lot, so I could not sleep at night and developed chest pain with just worrying, after a checkup with a heart specialist and experiments, everything was found to be normal. After that, I have not felt that way for 7 years. I don’t worry too much nowadays because if I worry, I harm myself and my body. So, why would I worry and why should you worry too, it's not like that your worrying will get you anywhere. You know that it’s not going to, but you still worry. Stop your worrying.


9.     You lose weight: If you are losing weight, it could be because of depression. You lose weight because you don’t eat well, you don’t sleep well. You lose the appetite for eating.


10. Your Physical problem: Gastrointestinal problems could be the reason for your depression. Indigestion is also could cause you a lot of depression. A headache, I told you before could you a lot of depression and you would ignore that pain because somehow you think to deserve the pain like I thought. There is always this problem with this thinking of getting what you deserve, it’s one of the signs of helplessness. We think we deserve pain, we deserve poverty, we deserve loneliness because we have done misdeeds. But it does not matter what you did or what you could not do, it's about forgiving yourself for the past, only when you become guilt-free, you will be free from all the heaviness that is stopping you from running towards your goal. Life is a one-time thing. You can always worry about the things that you don’t have, feel like you are wasting your time. Well, guess what, you don’t things to be happy, or to enjoy your time of life. You only need yourself to be happy, to enjoy your time. Always remember that no matter what you are doing, if you are enjoying your time, you are not wasting your life.


11.                         You have become lazy :


One of the main symptoms of depression is laziness.


You become lazy, if you are a student, you stop studying, you stop going to College. If you have a job, then you get your office late. You lose the sense of time. You stand and look at something, you get lost in thoughts. If you are inside your office, you look at the outside, you want to get out. You lose your focus on your work, students lose their attention in studying and they are distracted easily. And if someone has broken your heart recently, you keep thinking about that person and why she or he does not love you. You feel worse, you blame yourself. You talk negatively about yourself like you don’t love in your life and this goes on for days, you can not study well or work well. You try to numb your pain by watching a movie or a tv series or listening to music and it does help. But you get addicted to them because they keep you distracted from your own bad feelings.



CURE TO DEPRESSION :


The cure for depression is always forgiving and forgetting the past. There is also some shortcut such as antidepressant, but the effect is temporary. You have love yourself unconditionally, stop blaming yourself because you could not achieve something in your life.


To live a life for a big cause is always possible. For instance, you wanted to become a doctor, but you somehow could not become one, now you blame yourself, and even hate yourself for not working hard enough in the past. But whatever may be the reason for becoming a doctor, it is not the only noblest or lucrative job in the world. There are so many possibilities, you just have to choose one and work hard on that job and do good in the world. The ultimate goal of any work should be doing good, helping others, making the world a better place. It is not naïve to think you can have a good impact in the world. We think that it’s the money that brings happiness, yes we can buy foods, clothes, or a house or a car. But to be really happy money won’t be enough, you need to learn to enjoy the little things in life, for example, nature. Nature could be a great source of joy and happiness. Rain, wind, sunshine, trees, green leaves, clouds, birds, birds singing, everything that is surrounding you is nature, indeed you are also a part of nature.


HOW TO GET OUT OF DEPRESSION 




1.  First accept yourself just the way you are, don’t be hard on yourself, you don’t have to be perfect and good at everything, you just have to accept what you are good at and be master of it and improve what you are not so good at.




2. Second, you have to accept yourself, accept and love yourself for who you are and keep working every day to reach your full potential. 





3. Love everything about yourself,  love how you look, love how you sound, love how you walk, love your height, love your body shape, love your hair, love the whole package and if you can do that you will reach a dangerous level of confidence. You will radiate hope and energy everywhere you go.





4. We become depressed when we feel like we are helpless, but that's not true, nobody is helpless unless one accepts him or herself as weak.





5. If you become submissive to life's problem, you will end  up feeling depressed, you have to be dominant and face the problems and take them as a challenge.





6. When you think that you will be rejected by someone you love, you become depressed. You become depressed when you actually get rejected by someone, you become depressed when someone you love ignores you. Now, notice how you are making yourself miserable and depressed, you are no longer in control, you have lost the control of your life, emotions, and feelings. That’s a completely wrong move. Get out of the danger zone, gain control of your life, your emotions and feelings. 


You can make yourself happy, you don't have to be dependent on anyone to be happy. Happiness borns from within not from outside.





7.  There is also another reason you might be getting depressed even after you have accepted yourself, even after you love yourself completely, it happens when you feel financially insecure or when you are actually broke or you are afraid of being poor. The fear of being poor is one of the major reason of becoming depressed. Being afraid will not make you money, you have to be bold and make decisions about what you are going to do with your time, will you waste your time worrying about having no money or are you going work on something that will actually make you money. It’s the moment when you decide you are going to work rather than worrying, you take your first step towards financial freedom.





8. Happiness is a choice. It is true even though it sounds like too much, you can actually make yourself happy if you want and you can make yourself feel sad if you want. You can make yourself feel whatever you want. You feel whatever you think about, if you think about a natural place, you will feel peace, if you think about  sex, you will feel like having sex, if you think about god, you will find energy, if you think  about good memories, you will find yourself smiling, if you think about a cold place, you will feel cold, whatever you think about or whatever that goes on your head, you will also feel it, that’s why people watch movies, we get attached to our favorite character and we feel like we are experiencing whatever he or she experiences. So, you have the control over your feelings, the only thing you need to do is change what you are thinking about.





9. When you decide that you want to be happy, you become happy. You have to make decision that from now on you will be happy, you will do things that makes you happy, you will fulfill your dreams, you will pursue your passion, you become happy when you chose to be happy because no matter how depressed you get, things are not going to change, but if you make a decision to happy and be happy, your life will change. 

To change your life for the better, there is no other way than happiness.

Happiness is a choice and happiness is the way to your dreams and greatness.

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